imagine jim and bones high fiving each other now and then and spock assuming they’re in an S&M relationship because they keep spanking each other’s hands
jim kirk is the kind of person who is held prisoner in a room with a heavy ass typewriter
a sharp, knife-like letter opener
a heavy metal whatever this thing is
a big ol’ trash can which would be excellent for smashy smash
and instead of using any of these things he’s like, my weapon of choice?
is a fucking blanket
creativity, thy middle name is tiberius
what do you mean spock has been staring at his padd background for the last half hour. that would be totally illogical.
'there is no need for a “wallpaper” on a device used primarily for business and secondarily for communications,' spock says, when jim notes that he has not customized his PADD to differ from the default settings. 'the likelihood that i would spend time viewing the image set to such a function rather than conducting business is so minimal as to be negligible.'
among other inherited traits, their daughter shares jim’s uncanny penchant for proving spock wrong.
- hey. hey hey. chekov yourself before you wreckov yourself
- spock have you seen your ears HAVE YOU SEEN YOUR EARS
- sulu have you seen spock’s ears??????
- uhura what’s the DEAL with spock’s EARS
- SPOCK CAN I TOUCH YOUR EARS?
- hey scotty quick question. is it rude to ask to touch a vulcan’s ears? consider this: SPOCK’S EARS
- spock i apologize i should have chekoved myself before i wreckoved myself
- also bones won’t stop laughing i’m scared
after bones retires, he publishes his memoirs about serving as CMO on the enterprise, a bestseller among future medical officers in starfleet. it is called 1701 COMPLETED RESIGNATION FORMS I NEVER SUBMITTED (BUT SHOULD HAVE)
come on and party like it’s 2265
jim kirk’s snapchat account though, it would be amazing
him posing with the gorn like “aint easy being green” and one of his salad making a frowny face with tomato eyes and a red pepper slice mouth all “thanks a lot BONES”
and then a series of him posing…
hope you folks don’t mind me getting two birds with one stone here
an excerpt from the accurate event log of s’chn t’gai spock, age four and seven-eighths
"I refuse to engage in the behavior I have observed others employing with the infant. To say meaningless phrases such as ‘goo-goo’ or ‘ga-ga’ to a human at this stage of verbal development would be counter-productive. I have instead attempted to instruct him in simple scientific concepts such as relativity and special relativity and multiple theories of space-time. He then poked my nose with a small, wet finger. The experiment was not successful."